Another Anniversary

Tomorrow, July 7, is the 23rd anniversary of my final radiation treatment. While the first series of treatments covered more area of my body, I have to say the second series was far worse as far as the side effects went.

The area exposed in the second series was about a 4" x 10" rectangle along my abdominal midline below my diaphragm. This is when I stopped eating completely. While I was not eating much when I had the mantle (neck, and entire thorax) radiation, because food was too dry to go down, when I had the abdominal radiation, food came back up too readily. To this day, I cannot even fathom wanting to ingest a liquid protein shake. I get nauseous just thinking about it.

My treatments would have ended a week earlier, but my maternal grandpa died and with my doctor's okay, I went to spend a week in Milwaukee with my family. I did not know at the time that it was going to be the last time I saw my cousin, Gary.

At that time, Gary, unbeknownst to anyone but his parents, had just been diagnosed with HIV. Apparently, Hodgkins Lymphoma has some very similar symptoms to full-blown AIDS. And Gary, bless his heart, was asking me some rather pointed questions about what I was going through. I was confused as hell as to why Gary was asking me these gruesome questions, especially since Gary had a delicate sensibility. Yes, Gary was gay. But I have known straight men that had just as delicate a personality so let's just leave the stereotypes alone. Anyhow, at one point during our conversation (and I still kick myself mercilessly over this) Gary told me that he dreamed of meeting a nice woman, settling down, getting married, and having children. I wish I had told him to cut the bullshit, that I knew he was gay, that I loved him for who and what he was, and that if he wanted to marry a man and settle down, I would have nothing but blessing for him. I just did not have the guts at that time to say what needed to be said.

Gary died in the summer of 1990, when I was pregnant with my son. He did not allow his parents to tell anyone until a few days before he died. I did get to talk on the phone with him before he passed, and I told him I loved him, and that I wish I had known sooner, because I would have wanted to do something, anything, for him.

His death changed some things in his immediate family. Both of his parents got involved in AIDS related charities in Milwaukee. One of the things my aunt (Gary's mom) did, while I was sick, was send me these anonymous notes and little gifts (all containing Hershey Kisses), throughout all of my treatments. We were all trying to figure out who was sending the stuff the whole time. The last little gift came the day of my final treatment, when she revealed that it was she that was sending these things. I know people think I am so strong, but really I am not. She may never know how much the anonymous little notes and gifts helped me get through that time. One of the things she does with the AIDS hospice now, is send the little anonymous notes and gifts to various patients there. My aunt and uncle have served as the Grand Marshals of the Milwaukee Gay Pride parade. My aunt also made a quilt panel to memorialize Gary's life. Here is a photo of his little section:

I still cry when I think of him.

Swim Meet

K had her first swim meet of the season today. It was at a pool that we had never been to before, so we attempted to get there early. Thankfully our friends A and S had gotten there and saved us a spot for our canopy next to theirs.

Because it was the first meet this year, the procedures seemed to start off a little rusty (all around - not just the host team). Thankfully the rust was shaken off quickly and we were home after the meet before 1:30 PM.

K swam in the mixed medley relay as the backstroke leg, the butterfly, freestyle, and the mixed freestyle relay. She turned in personal best scores in both of her individual races. Not bad for having been out late last night. In fact, last night, the nerves got the best of her and she was nauseous for much of the evening. Thank goodness she got over that and was able to swim this morning.

I am on the ribbon writing committee for the team, so our family pretty much has our volunteer commitment covered for the season. At one point, the co-president of the team came into our canopy to ask for help at the scoring table. S (who shared our canopy) was unable to go help, so I did. My job for the team has now changed to card sorter and Heat Winner ribbon writer. K and S (the people inputting the times into the computer) had gotten behind, as K, who was trying to log both the Heat Winners and the DQs (disqualifications), before the cards were input by S. I got over there, and was able to get to work on the HW stuff, and in no time we were running smoothly. So the co-pres asked me if I would do that job for the rest of the season. I work so well with K and S, so I said I would. Even though it is quite a longer time commitment (basically the entire meet). I love working with people who are easy to work with. It makes things so much more pleasant.

Summer

My goal for this summer is to get more organized. I am starting with the garage. The garage has gotten to such a state that we can only park one car inside. This needs to change. I figure if I work on it for a couple of hours a day, I should have things back to being manageable in about a week or two.

I would work longer, but between the heat, and my back pain, I really can't overdo it.

So far, the weirdest thing I have found in the garage is a dog leash. What makes that weird is that I have not owned a dog in my entire adult life. Not sure where the leash came from, but it is going to the Goodwill drop box, since we have no need for a dog leash.

I will be making a run tomorrow to the Goodwill dropbox, with about a trunkload of various items we have no need for. May as well offer them up for reuse.

One bad thing, somehow a bottle of Murphy's Oil Soap exploded on the garage floor, and I almost fell on my ample arse when I slipped on it today. I am not sure if there is a more slippery substance than Murphy's Oil Soap. Not sure if I want to find that out either.

Photos of Plants from the Campout

Not going to do a whole lot of text here, just going to let the photos speak for themselves.

Game Show

Yesterday K and I went (with a bunch of people from K's school) to be in the studio audience for a taping of a new game show to be debuting on the brand new Hub Network (a collaboration between Hasbro and Discovery) in October. It was a fundraiser for the PTA, the 15 people who went, earned almost $300 for the PTA.

The show is called "Pictureka!" and is based upon the popular board game bearing the same name. K happens to have both the "Pictureka!" game and the "Pictureka Kubes" game. They are both fun and fast paced games, based upon finding items hidden in the pictures. With my vision, I am at a distinct disadvantage in playing the game, but it is still a lot of fun.

I have been to tapings of other shows before, most recently, a taping of The Price Is Right. To say that the producers of "Pictureka!" have yet to work the bugs out of the production would be a vast understatement. We got there about 2:00 PM and were there for the taping of 2 1/2 episodes. The episodes are 1/2 hour (probably more like 22 minutes) in length, and we did not end up leaving until 7:45 PM. In most cases, having been to tapings before, a half hour show normally would take about 75 to 90 minutes to get through. So for the episodes we taped, the max should have been about 3 to 3 1/2 hours. Not 5:45. Yikes.

Most of the staff were young kids in their twenties, which was kind of funny. When it was time to distribute snacks, water, etc. their lack of inexperience in dealing with large groups of people, especially children was very apparent. Handing stuff out one at a time does not work in such situations. Finally one woman who was with a group from Compton Parks and Recreation got up and loaded up on stuff and helped the 'kids' get it all doled out. It was pretty comical.

Of course, we could not have our cellphones in the studio, so there was no way of contacting anyone outside to let them know we would be running later than planned. UGH.

For awhile, I was seated next to a guy who was a 'paid audience member'. I found that phenomenon to be rather interesting. I would seriously consider doing the paid audience gig, if I lived a lot closer to the television studios in L.A. J. was an interesting guy. Very funny and snarky. They had the children sitting in the center section, separate from the adults, as this is a show aimed to kids from 7-14.

K and I did have a good time, in spite of how disorganized the production was. And as a bonus, I was able to take a photo of K with the Hollywood sign in the background on my cellphone.

Camping

We went camping with K's Girl Scout troop this weekend. There were camp songs, camp fires, silly skits, a wonderful Bridging ceremony (our girls bridged from Brownie Girl Scouts to Junior Girl Scouts). We went on a robust hike. Had numerous runs to the BIFFY, encountered Poison Oak on the hiking trail. Thankfully nobody got the rash from it.

We really packed a lot into the camp out. All the girls learned how to light a one-match fire, cook over a propane camp stove, cook over a charcoal grill, and of course they made S'mores over the camp fire.

All in all we had a great time. Our weather was really nice (not too hot - got pretty cold at night though). The only two casualties for our family were the broken air pump for the air mattresses and the broken pole for the rainfly on our tent. Not bad, not bad at all.

Overall, our girls were well behaved, and I think they all learned a lot. I would even venture to say that our girls were better behaved than the Boy Scout troop that was in one of the other group campsites.

As soon as I find my camera, I will post photos of the various plant life we encountered on the trip. Such rugged beauty.

I know I will sleep well tonight. Especially since, near our campsite, was the home of a rooster that was seriously in need of some re-calibration. The darn thing was crowing all night long.

Milestones

The Brownie troop had its final meeting (as a Brownie troop) last night. On Friday, at our family camp out, our girls will bridge to Junior Girl Scouts. I am so proud of our girls, and what they have accomplished as Brownies. Seems like only yesterday, they were Daisy Scouts, and now they are on the verge of the next level.

Our girls (most of them, anyway) have gone through the splitting of troops because of differences in opinion between adults. I think sometimes we all lose sight of what this is all about. This is about the girls, their healthy development, and challenging them to do their best and become strong and confident young women. It is not about being a glorified play date, tea party, or an avenue for the leader to feed her own needs for public approval. As a co-leader, I strive to keep the girls' best interests in mind. And thankfully, our troop's leader has the same philosophy regarding the troop as I do. She is really an incredible woman.

I wanted to leisurely spend the week preparing for the camp out, but due to some other circumstances, I am going to only have today to prepare. Oh well.